Getting Adjusted

So I am watching the Adjustment Bureau and I found a quote that hits pretty close to home, "I'm not some hopeless romantic. I would never allow myself to be that way. You ruined me. I didn't want to settle for less."

I felt like they took it right out of me. I have never been a hopeless romantic. I never wanted to be. I was fine being a slightly cynical realist. Then came what ruined me. I haven't wanted to settle for less than what I felt and thought I knew.

I don't want to hold on to something that hurts me but I definitely don't want to give up on something I want so badly. Something that felt more right than anything else in my entire life. Something that hurt more than I could ever explain or could have imagined. And knowing that the feeling of losing it hurt so much makes me hold on to it. If it hurt that much to lose it, what would it feel like to have it back?

So what do I do? It's hard to navigate through. And it may be what is keeping from getting where I am supposed to be.